Liliaeth (liliaeth) wrote,

Why my Buffy will never sub.

I'm a silly person, with silly ideas, so instead of just ignoring some latest challenge from someone on btvs kink, I decided to actually respond to it.

The guy asking for it, had this idea about a dominant Xander who makes the girls his bitches, under the influence of something or other. (he even had this idea that Xander might do so by using drugs or something at the start)

Basic fact is, it went in so much aganst my ideas of Buffy that I responded with this:
Hmm, I was thinking about this challenge and it would have to happen while
Buffy and Willow are out of town. Because there is no way in hell, ever
that Xander could dominate either Buffy or Willow. If he tried it to Buffy,
she'd kick his ass to hell and beyond*g*

No contest.

That and Buffy's such an uberdom that the idea of her as a sub and liking it
goes in against everything I believe about the character. I mean, just look
at s6, she was so the dom to Spike's sub.
It's one of the reasons he loves her*g* He tends to fall for doms that can
keep him down*g*

So in short, to me this challenge might be interesting with Buffy out of
town and the pairing as Xander/Anya. Either that or with Buffy as the dom
over Xander and Spike and finding out she likes it*g*

Sorry, Buffy's one of the three characters on Buffy and Angel whom I could
never ever see as a sub. She might bottom, but she'd be the dom even from
the bottom.

Buffy, Angel and Hamilton, three chars who'd just never ever sub. And if
they were forced into it, they'd one, have to be broken to accept it and
would hate it up to a point where they'd break free and kick the ass of
whomever tried to force them into it*g*

Just my opinion though.


As you might notice I'm very opinionated and should just have ignored the challenge post since well... it's his good right to have a kink about het dominant Xander.

Anyway, he responded like I said and it got this response out of me, after rereading it, I thought I might as well post it on my lj to at least save it as my ideas on Buffy as a dominant and some short notes on where in my opinion the other chars fall in the spectrum.

Nah that's not Buffy.

Guess I'm very strict in my Buffy, to me she's the alpha. No doubts, no hesitation. It's not just that she's the alpha bitch, she's the alpha. Period. Buffy's not happy, when she's not in charge, try and put her down and you have to break her, destroy her and she'd NOT be happy. The idea of a Buffy who's happy as a sub, for me went out of the window about around the middle of s2.
(it's to me one of the reasons I can't even think of a way that B/A could ever work, since they both are total and absolute alphas and would be in an endless struggle over who's in charge if they ever actually tried to have a real relationship. I may not like Buffy/Xander much because I prefer them as brother and sister, but unlike B/A they could actually work, because Xander does have it in him to submit)

Buffy expects and wants people to follow behind her. Buffy doesn't like to be commanded, she doesn't like to be ordered and for most of s6 she was on top, period. She's the one who pulled the strings.

She might have pretended to let Spike be on top, but for every second of that relationship, she was in charge. She was the one who decided where it went, how far he got to go.

That's just Buffy, she feels responsible, she leads.

A Buffy who's weak, who follows, who needs to be ordered around is not Buffy to me. It's some oc with Buffy's name. And in a situation like that I don't care who you ship her with, but if you write Buffy, for me she has to be the alpha to be Buffy.

And from what we saw in s6, Buffy could very much be into bondage games. She just prefers to be the one on top. (note her dream in Dead Things where Spike's the one in the handcuffs?) She's just ashamed of herself because she likes it so much.

Thing with Xander is that he could be a dom, it just doesn't come natural to him. He can be violent, petty and abusive, but he doesn't have it in him naturally to be in charge, because he's basically a beta. He's not an alpha guy. Neither is Spike for that matter, so don't see that as an insult.
(Spike by the way is a sub. A pushy sub at times, but definitely a sub, which is why he works so well with Buffy in my opinion. )

I usually don't like guys who are total alphas like Angel or Mal Reynolds, so to me saying a guy is not an alpha is a compliment.

Now Willow can go both ways. But she'd be a passive agressive sub if she were to be a sub. Controlling her dom from the bottom. But I could see her letting Xander be in control. Don't like reading about her, but I could understand when people see her like that.

Anya on the other hand is looking for identity, which is why I could see her enjoying to let Xander be in charge. And do as he tells her, because like her capitalisme she'd feel it'd give her a place in society.

Tara... not so sure, I think she's so unsure of herself that she might go with what the other person wants, but... thing with Tara is, she has a core of steel and if Xander tried to push her too far, she'd push back and then Xander'd better start running.

Sorry for going on a tangent, just my ideas on the chars.


Now to add to that with a part I forgot to mention in the email. One argument that always convinced me of Buffy's unwillingness to submit happens in Crush.

Spike has her chained up. He also has Dru chained up. And he asks her one thing, one bit of a crumb and if she gives him that, just some notion that maybe, one day, in the future, not even right now, she might come to feel something for him. Then he'll stake Dru for her and let her go.

He has her helpless, threatens to set Dru on her and what's her response?
"The only chance you had with me was when I was unconscious."

Think about it, she was helpless, in his power and at risk of being fed to Dru and all she had to do was pretend to submit. She didn't even have to mean it. Just give in one bit, let Spike believe there was some hint of a chance and he'd have let her go.

But she doesn't, because Buffy doesn't submit. She also doesn't generally lie. But the basic fact is that Buffy's not someone who'd be happy letting someone else make her decisions for her. No matter who that decision maker would be.

And it's that exact quality in her that makes me a Buffy fan, so sorry if I'm a bit over the top about it, I just don't like to see my Buffy made into a sub, because to me a Buffy who subs post s2 is just plain not Buffy.

(For those wondering, no I don't think I'll give his posts. His first post was on a private yahoo group and his second response was in a personal email and I'm not sure if I have the right to post either of them without his permission. In case you're interested in his original post you can find and read it by joining thisgroups

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